Business Benefits
- A recent UK and North American study of over 500 executives, placed the cost to business of a separation and divorce at over £5000 per employee p.a.
- One as yet unpublished Australian study has established a high link between relationship problems and excessive use of employee sick-leave and worker's compensation payments.Australian EAP (Employee Assistance Provider) organisations consistently report relationship related issues as the major presenting category.
A thought primer for employers with male employees in the throws of a separation!
Most of his motivations for working just walked out the door!
Over 52,000 Australian marriages ended in 1997/98 (ABS), with women initiating the divorce in approximately 2/3rds of cases. It is well established that the end of a marriage is one of life's major stresses, so when a valued male employee's partner walks out the door (particularly with the kids), there's a good chance your employee's productivity just took a walk too. Further, that productivity is not likely to return in a hurry, unless someone actively intervenes. As an employer you have the most to lose financially, so it is in your financial interest to act and act soon.
The net effect on most men is that they will not only lose their partner, but daily contact with their children, a significant part of their income in child support, and the majority of their assets in property settlement. Less visible, but far more important, is the fact that for many men their self-image is ne`arly totally connected with those relationships and possessions, so they go into a period of real confusion about who they are and what worth they have.
What does that mean for you as an employer?
In the most fundamental of economic terms, until he restabilises some sense that life and work are worthwhile, his motivation and capacity to work will be decimated and your investment in him, as an employee, will pay low dividends.
You could respond in several ways:
- Cut your losses and fire him.
- Ignore the issue and hope that he will recover sooner, rather than later or
- You can be pro-active - actively commissioning the philosophy behind your company's engagement of a quality EAP, that of supporting employees during challenging periods, firm in the knowledge that these employees will return to high productivity and with higher loyalty in response to the practical support the organisation provided.
There are significant problems associated with strategies 1 and 2. Firing employees caught up in this all-too-common-problem may appear to solve it, but what is the effect on remaining employees? What is the message they read? What about sunken and replacement costs? All of a sudden, what appeared to be a localised problem becomes diffuse and unfocused, so much harder to rectify.
How about option 2? One of the most common effects of sustained high stress is the onset of depression and the longer an individual suffers with depression, the longer their recovery. This also carries the risk that they will eventually experience some work incident, which will present as the trigger for an expensive and prolonged work-related sick leave or workers compensation expense. That is not a low cost option.
That makes option 3 the only one that is viable for both the individual and for the smart organisation.
Your EAP or Human Resources department may have developed links to the MENDS program for Separated Men and can refer suitable employees specifically to address this costly problem.
MENDS is a 12 week support program, the first of its type in the country developed specifically to address the needs of men. It provides relevant information, skills and contacts that men need to navigate this difficult time: the essentials on relating to their own needs, their children, potential new partners, health and legal issues.
As a manager or supervisor you are in a unique situation to encourage them to be pro-active, to not make the mistake of doing that Aussie bloke thing - that of trying to tough it out. Experience shows that approach will not only waste his personal time and money: but will most certainly impact negatively on your organisation.
Is support and access to the right information all that important?
Research reveals separated Australian males are over 6 times as likely to suicide as their married (male) peers. If they are under 30, that risk rises to nearly 9 times. That provides some insight into how hopeless the world can appear to some men in this situation.
But that doesn't tell the whole story. The exceptionally high levels of stress experienced by many men results in severely impaired physical, mental, emotional and cognitive functioning. In the workplace that often results in a whole range of problems: increased risk of occupational health and safety problems, poor business decisions, impaired communication with work associates, customers and suppliers.
Managers have an important role to play in identifying and encouraging employees in such circumstances. Frequently managers, team leaders and supervisors are among the first to find out that something is amiss in an employees life - late arrivals, heightened sick leave, poor workmanship and untypical work behaviours are all common symptoms that something is out of place. But that is not all! Male employees frequently freeze in the face of family dissolution. They then fail to access quality information early, and too often listen to "the boy's network", which may contain well intentioned, but outdated and even very misleading advice.Separated men often fall into paying out "guilt-money", hoping that the indulgence of their partners' wants will somehow help mend the relationship. Whilst this may work sometimes, when the relationship has reached a terminal point, that strategy, if you can call it that, can bleed a man dry, until it is too late and his resources too depleted for him to effect a timely recovery.A broken man, in the end, does no one any favours: even his children will be hurt if he cannot afford to provide a comfortable and welcoming place when they spend time with him.
Do you have to be a specialist in this difficult area to be of support to your employees?
Of course not? The important thing to know is what you don't know and to point the man via your organisation's EAP at MENDS or direct to MENDS. In this way you can be sure you have done the very best by the man and his family, and you have protected the massive investment your organisation has in each of the people that make up your team.
